Ballad of Losing Lovers

MJ Villavicencio

Personal feeling is the relationship of love and how it goes through moments of heartbreak, being connected, and past chances of being with someone. I wanted to show that teenagers have deeper, older feelings that can be poetic, and that having relationships is a lot more work than being artificial, or on the top of the basic stereotypes we hear about "young love." That's what this poem makes me imagine. 

"Ballad of Losing Lovers"

I needed me to be your anchor

While I sank below the ship of your storm

Everything is okay until the okays turn into “this isn’t what we promised anyway”

Until I have to convince you everything’s going to be okay

And I need to be the strong one because breaking your shell is too much of a nightmare

We think everything’s okay and that it’s perfect when you’re clutching my thighs and I’m kissing your chest

But they don’t tell you once you leave the peace of your bed it’s all a reality you don’t want to live

You and I love each other that’s true but why can’t we convince ourselves everything we need to do has to be

because we believe in me and you

It’s not a war when you’re on both losing sides

It’s not a break when you’re gluing in the cracks before people notice they’re fragile, hoping they seal together so fast

you don’t see when they are actually splitting far and sliding against each other until one slips off

Because this relationship isn’t your cup of tea

You’re not patient enough to see that you’ve got to swallow the bitter before you feel the sweet

Saying I love you is just as fun and secure as breathing is for someone on a ventilator

Is it really true?

We talk and talk and it’s always I know

But how are you still doing these things If you’re supposed to be aware?

You say and do say and do

But please understand when I die all I’ll have are these memories of what you give me I can’t breathe in before I go

because they need to stay out

I need to be felt

I need to be reassured and held to feel secure

Not when it’s convenient to how you feel

Because being with me isn’t convenience it’s a promise

And if you can’t hope you’ll be the best for me your only option is to let this die

You can’t just make these changes by yourself

Because you’re bringing me with you

How can you expect who taught you to swim to drown because you’re too scared to let go to learn how to float in the

roaring ocean?

I know you’re tired and anxious and waiting

For your life to be full of bliss again

You need the break, the antidote

And I’ll help you find yours

But have you ever bothered to think to help me find mine?

You never asked for it

Not at all

But why do I get the end of the rod where you put it in the pit

Because I’m not doing what you’ve been expecting

If you never asked for me?

I go all in you see it now

So please just consider

I don’t always have my own how

I don’t have my back

My mental is going loose

You need to help me too

For there to be a me and you