MJ Villavicencio
Personal feeling is the relationship of love and how it goes through moments of heartbreak, being connected, and past chances of being with someone. I wanted to show that teenagers have deeper, older feelings that can be poetic, and that having relationships is a lot more work than being artificial, or on the top of the basic stereotypes we hear about "young love." That's what this poem makes me imagine.
"Ballad of Losing Lovers"
I needed me to be your anchor
While I sank below the ship of your storm
Everything is okay until the okays turn into “this isn’t what we promised anyway”
Until I have to convince you everything’s going to be okay
And I need to be the strong one because breaking your shell is too much of a nightmare
We think everything’s okay and that it’s perfect when you’re clutching my thighs and I’m kissing your chest
But they don’t tell you once you leave the peace of your bed it’s all a reality you don’t want to live
You and I love each other that’s true but why can’t we convince ourselves everything we need to do has to be
because we believe in me and you
It’s not a war when you’re on both losing sides
It’s not a break when you’re gluing in the cracks before people notice they’re fragile, hoping they seal together so fast
you don’t see when they are actually splitting far and sliding against each other until one slips off
Because this relationship isn’t your cup of tea
You’re not patient enough to see that you’ve got to swallow the bitter before you feel the sweet
Saying I love you is just as fun and secure as breathing is for someone on a ventilator
Is it really true?
We talk and talk and it’s always I know
But how are you still doing these things If you’re supposed to be aware?
You say and do say and do
But please understand when I die all I’ll have are these memories of what you give me I can’t breathe in before I go
because they need to stay out
I need to be felt
I need to be reassured and held to feel secure
Not when it’s convenient to how you feel
Because being with me isn’t convenience it’s a promise
And if you can’t hope you’ll be the best for me your only option is to let this die
You can’t just make these changes by yourself
Because you’re bringing me with you
How can you expect who taught you to swim to drown because you’re too scared to let go to learn how to float in the
roaring ocean?
I know you’re tired and anxious and waiting
For your life to be full of bliss again
You need the break, the antidote
And I’ll help you find yours
But have you ever bothered to think to help me find mine?
You never asked for it
Not at all
But why do I get the end of the rod where you put it in the pit
Because I’m not doing what you’ve been expecting
If you never asked for me?
I go all in you see it now
So please just consider
I don’t always have my own how
I don’t have my back
My mental is going loose
You need to help me too
For there to be a me and you
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